A month REALLY... WoW!!

In this month... we decided to open our home to a young man who is a hockey player for a "travel" team. He is from the east coast. We get paid to host him. It seemed like an easy thing to do a month ago. We have space. We like hockey. We are flexible & compassionate people. We've had kids in our home before. He will be here until March or early April and I am excited for that!

He is a nice kid. He has alot of growing up to do. He is 18 and extremely self centered & self serving. He lacks compassion for a small boy. He makes comments that while they are not intentionally mean - I internalize them & my feelings are getting hurt. His schedule is disrupting. He is clumsy & not very quiet when sometimes we need quiet for our sleeper! He eats like a garbage disposal - EVERYTHING. I feel like I am at the store every day.. and I don't like taking Espen out to the store every day. He is not home very often and that is how we manage. And when the chance arises, Espen drools on him!

So I just ask myself - can I manage for 4 more months - I believe I can. It seemed like a good way to make a little extra money. Well the best ideas.........

I often miss my blog.... I miss my creative outpouring of words! I have this co-worker that has these lofty yearly goals... for example this year she watched a documentary a day for the whole year... so I think what I could do every day for the whole year.... I'd like to say exercise or eat a salad or pray or not get grouchy but I don't know if that will happen... more likely I believe I could blog every day.... so i'm going to think on it...

My treadmill is moving inside. After much discussion I will loose part of my desk and some of the 'open space' in the downstairs. But it has a new belt & it should work great! So perhaps I could run more....

I ordered a new journal... One Line A Day... the theory is to just write one line a day ... it is 5 years worth of lines...I am excited!!

My baby is awesome... growing.... knows so many words.... is social.... funny.... cute as a button... demanding... tireing... exhausting... curious.... focused.... and lovey somedays... often I don't feel like I am a good enough mom for him because he is so wonderful.... I am so proud of him. It seems strange to somedays be so tired and drained and so thrilled to have one little smile from such a cute little boy.... and still to want to have just a tiny moment carved out for myself..... it is a delicate balance I am still tring to manage.... and the new environment is challenging that and me....

I would appreciate suggestions on finding that balance....

So while it seemed like a good idea - we will not do it again.

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