September 15 ~ 2011 ~ Silhouette Disaster
But the notion of being able to so quickly cut a silhouette fascinates me and I wanted one so I signed us up. We were there on time and there was a delay in the schedule. I TIME everything perfectly and am usually prepared for human error. I had put us for 11:45am thinking it was a 5 minute appointment & then I'd take my boy wonder to lunch. Well at 12:20 we were finally finished. He was full of nuts & gummie snacks and FUSSY. The silhouette is cute. It was fascinating watching Karl cut it. I can't say for certain it looks like my son, but I know it was cut with Espen in front of this man.
Then everything went wrong. As I was getting in my purse to pay this kind man, Espen made his way toward the door of the store past about 5 waiting moms. They had all their diaper bags & stuff blocking the 10 feet to the door & they were milling about chatting, waiting for their turn. THEY WERE WATCHING THE EVENTS UNFOLD. I had my purse & wallet out and an eye on my little boy. I knew he was headed to the door, I had told him we were leaving. He reached the door as I handed the money to the man. And BAM just that fast Espen was strong & determined enough to push open the door & go outside. The parking lot is 3 feet from the door and is a busy lot especially at lunch time. HE WAS OUTSIDE. The crazy moms watched him make his escape. I was 10 feet from the door. I left my things right where they were, PUSHED PAST the waiting moms who did not move themselves or their junk, and grabbed my son just as he stepped off the curb into oncoming traffic. FEAR had ahold of me. I carried him into the store & collected my things. I heard comments like "she needs to leash him", "he is hyper", "what a handful"... Yea Yea Yea... What they heard was "Espen you will be in timeout for going outside without mommy but I am more upset with the group of adults in here right now who didn't move to let me pass or make an effort to stop you before you went out the door... these mom's will have a bad karma day one day and fear will reach them.".... And of course my son only heard timeout the rest was not for his ears...
So I left crying. Crying at my own stupid self for thinking for an instant he couldn't push open a glass store door (DUH of course he can). Crying because I am so kind that if I was standing there & some kid was pushing the door open I WOULD FREAKING DO SOMETHING. Crying because after over a year I hate this freaking community and can't for the life of me figure out what Espen & I are doing wrong. Crying because I was tired and scared and hungry and so was my little guy... I cried to Doug & Anders and both of them calmly just listened and told me to calm down while I was driving us home.... Today was a total accident. Yes it was my mistake. I'm not careless with Espen. I'm vigilant. I am cautious when necessary. I believe in the goodness of people. And especially other mothers at a high end baby boutique. Right now I feel like I give up. There are no good people in Omaha. If you find one, they are not from around here. If you need a good person you better look elsewhere. It's not like me to give up on goodness but today... I tell you I wish I hadn't wasted my TIME (it takes me 30 minutes to get to this flippin store), my MONEY ($40 for the pair of silhouettes) and my ENERGY.
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