300th Post

This is my 300th post.  Strange to think I had so much to say.. but not really... I am wordy & like to talk.  I've also had over 5000 page views... not many by some standards but for me it seems like quite a bit. 

I just looked back to my first blog....it all began when Espen was 9 months old... seems like eons ago!  So much has happened since that first blog post.  Days of inspiration and heartache.  Hours of total stress and utter happiness.  Minutes of idle speculation and joyous wonder.  I have shared openly and honestly some of my harshest moments and some of my greatest joys.  My husband has hated every word.  But it isn't a blog about him... and as much as he has hated it, he has looked over to see what I'm writing about and smiled on occassion! 

I read in a magazine yesterday about being a more Zen parent...  two things stuck in the back of my mind... leave no trace and mindfulness....  I'm no follower but it does take incredible amounts of practice to be mindful... live in THIS moment.  I have been trying for years now!  It is easier to let my mind wander to the "should have" and the "what's up next" than to be present in this moment and mindful of those experiences.  I try to read, play and do with Espen and limit the multitasking.  Somedays it is the hardest thing to do and others it just comes naturally (it's all the practice!).  So at this moment I am right here... at post 300!  I celebrate that!!  It is a cool thing for the little blogger that broke stuff!

And to leave no trace... well thats a bit harder here!  But if we get it out, we put it away... it is a hard thing to learn and harder yet to do... And we naturally leave a trace... look I am leaving one now.  I want there to be a trace of me left behind.  Someday I may not be here...and my son can read mommys blog and gain insight, inspiration, embarassment and an occassional life lesson!  So while we don't leave a trace of ourselves when we move from space to space... we must leave an imprint of ourselves on others.  It is the way it should be...

I will contine to blog.  It is calming and clearing for me.  It inspires me to check my language and my vocabulary.  In this community that I have a hard time adjusting to I need an outlet to positively express myself.  It entertains me to write a blog.  I feel like technology is not getting away from me if I write a blog.  And most likely I will continue to break stuff.... I just can't help it... I think it is just my way...

Tomorrow or the next day I will write blog 301....  will you be here?