Bumps in the road

 Feb 3.  We are just over one month into the new year.  And already it feels like the LONGEST year.  

Yesterday I called the wrestling coach and through tears informed him that sadly my brilliant son would not be getting on the bus because he did something stupid resulting in a suspension.  I cried.  Maybe he heard and ignored my sniffles.  This is the second time I have made this call.  

My child is a good kid.  Yet this is the second time in 10 days to be suspended.  He hates it.  He hates school.  He hates being suspended.  He hates every part of it.  Still, he cannot stop his impulsive behavior.    I do not believe for one second he is being malicious or a bully.  He believes he is a funny guy.  He gets caught up in the fun and cannot regulate back.  He is struggling to see the consequences of his immediate actions.  He is a good kid.  He is currently doing well in his classes.  And until being suspended, was active in a sport he has chosen to love and band where his heart is happy.  

I have made an appointment to have his medication evaluated.  I have set an appointment with a counselor.  I cried.  I have cancelled things and spent extra time with him being positive and encouraging.  Patience and love and constant affirmations matter.  I emailed the principals asking to meet to see if we can implement a mentor or a check in system for him since it is happening at the same time of day.  He needs a hand other than suspension perhaps.  A plan to help him breach this moment in time when he needs help.  

The coach had the kindest things to say and imparted some wisdom.  Youth this age (pre-teen/teen) are wearing many masks.  They are trying on all kinds of masks to see who they are, where they belong and find their place in the world.  It is a hard few years of trial and error for them, an emotional roller coaster with lots of blimps and bumps.  Thankfully he gave us grace in his belief that my child is a good kid.  

While we navigate these uncharted waters I may look haggard.  While we figure out solutions we may have more bad days than good.  We are here for the long haul... not going anywhere. I will hug him as many times as needed and keep on believing he is a good kid.